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Smoking Top 10 List Archives
Published 10/16/01
Latest List & Winners | Previous Lists | Contribute to Next List | Rules
"Top 10 warnings on cigarette labels"
10. Failure to consume this product may result in increased longevity.
9. Warning! Cigarette smoking may cause death and a loss of revenue for our shareholders.
8. Warning: It's not all in your head; everyone IS giving you dirty looks.
7. Smoking has been linked to serious diminishment of bank account.
6. Warning: switching brands may cause you more trouble, stick to our brand.
5. Smoking won't kill you...well, ok so it will, but so will walking out in front of a bus or jumping out of an airplane, even getting hit by lightening...so why not?
4. Warning: If not hidden well, this product causes grounding.
3. WARNING: Smoking reserved for people on fire only.
2. Warning: if you quit smoking, the government will find another way to tax you. Smoke your money.
and the #1 warning on cigarette labels...
1. The Surgeon General recommends switching to smokeless tobacco, at least that way you can see your cancer.
The Top 10 Authors:
Kerry Maddocks - 1
Lorraine Boykin - 2, 6
Lance Jilbert - 3
Ginger - 4, 10
Ellie - 5
Patricia Surrey - 7
Amy - 8
Karen D. - 9
Congratulations to the winners!
You can contribute to the next top 10 list. Give your funny bone a workout!