Smoking Top 10 List Archives
Published 02/20/02
Latest List & Winners
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"Top 10 signs my New Year's resolution to
quit smoking is NOT working"
10. My kids are begging me to smoke again.
9. Instead of smoking you lick ashtrays.
8. You find yourself still digging through the ashtray for already used butts that have little to no tobacco in them, contain old saliva, are covered in ashes and you smoke 30 such
butts in desperation on your way to the store in your pajamas and a coat to buy a pack of whole cigarettes at 3 am when you woke up for a "midnight snack".
7. Because I actually broke open one of those "in case of emergency break open, light and smoke" glass tubes with a cigarette & match in it that I received as a JOKE years ago!!!!!
6. Everyone tells me "I'm still praying for you".
5. Your non-smoking friends still send ads for pre pay funerals.
4. The whole Linda Blair-"Exorcist"-head spinning thing seems within the realm of possibility.
3. The greeter at Wal-Mart has a case of ash trays waiting for you on January 2.
2. The dentist gave me a discount for daily cleanings.
and the #1 sign my New Year's resolution to quit smoking is NOT working...
1. You still refer to your bank overdraft protection as your emergency cigarette fund.
The Top 10 Authors:
Mike - 1,3,5
Cynthia Krawczyk - 2,6
Greg Rosenau - 4
Eileen Duncan - 7
rogue_whitewolf - 8
Melissa Price - 9
Jacki - 10
Congratulations to the winners!
You can contribute to the next top 10 list.
Give your funny bone a workout!
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