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Smoking Top 10 List Archives
Published 11/01/02
Latest List & Winners | Previous Lists | Contribute to Next List | Rules
"Top 10 signs that the secondhand smoke from my cigarettes is bothering my family and friends."
13. They've taught my parrot to cough when I light up. (This one is TRUE, dude).
12. People invite me outside to admire the stars, and its daytime.
11. Every time I light up a cigarette they stop, drop and roll.
10. They lied to the hospital so they could put me in a bubble.
9. Their Christmas wish list consists of Gas Masks, fire extinguishers and Air fresheners.
8. Their last Christmas present for me was a skeleton.
7. You have an environmental awareness group protesting on your lawn.
6. My goldfish is wearing a little gas mask.
5. She left with the garbage man riding on back of the truck.
4. Smoke...?? Bothering?? Ah, no - the only reason why the lawn-sprinklers recently installed in their living rooms are working while I'm present is to create better climatic circumstances for their indoor plants...
3. Your family goes to Los Angeles for fresh air.
2. My friends have named their secondhand smoke related coughs after me.
and the #1 sign that the secondhand smoke from my cigarettes is bothering my family and friends....
1. They're dead.
The Top 10 Authors:
Brent Hillier - 1
Dana C - 2
Marissa McClung - 3, 7
Claudia - 4, 8
Alvin E. Kiesinger - 5
Cher Staton - 6
Lynnie Jones - 9, 13
Amy Mesojedec - 10
Lynnie Jones - 11
Lee Koecke - 12
Congratulations to the winners!
You can contribute to the next top 10 list. Give your funny bone a workout!